Beru's Haven

Trying to live as normal a life while knowing I have cancer...

Saturday, November 05, 2005

Sometimes I make no sense...

I know this. I just write this thing more off the top of my head. I don't usually check it for errors, etc. It's just kind of follows my train of thought, and I'll tell you, the conductor isn't always there...
That's okay though. Either you read it or don't. In fact, besides myself, I'm beginning to feel no one reads this thing. I just realized though that I had comments turned off unless you were registered with Blogger, so I changed that. Just remember what mother told you: If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.
I finally got a bookcase. Well, actually, it's an media center, but it allows me to put my dvds and tapes (yes, I still have some) on it and frees up the bookcase I already had. It all works out well.
I never got a loveseat.
My legs and feet are still bothering me. I really think it's neuropathy caused by the chemotherapy. Things you may, or may not know about chemotherapy- 'cuz I sure didn't know until I started it. 1) You don't necessarily go bald, or lose hair. My first 4 rounds of chemo up here in Sherman I didn't really lose much hair at all- nothing noticeable. This time- I've had 3 rounds so far- I was losing enough that I was panicked and buzzed my hair off. This was probably a mistake because my hair on top, while thin, stopped coming out. The bald spots are mainly on the sides of my head. Now, however, I have a constant reminder of what I'm going through. 2) Not all chemo medicines are the same- therefore another reason why sometimes you lose your hair, sometimes you don't. 3) A lot of people I encounter doing chemo have these things called "ports" put in under their skin and it's direct into the vein and they put in your chemo that way. It involves maintenance and such, and I'm just not really crazy about that idea. 4) Chemo takes a while to drip- my current meds take around 5-6 hours. Of course, with all courses of treatment, cancer types, etc, things may be different for different people. 5) You don't necessarily lose weight and throw up all over the place like you see in the movies. Some people do, I haven't... In fact, I've gained some weight, and I know someone else who has as well. Yeah, I may not look the best, but I don't look like death. Amazing.
Saw "Serenity" again today at the dollar theatre. That's about the only thing exciting that I've done today.
James came over last night and we watched "Indiscreet"- Cary Grant and Ingrid Bergman, and then "The Phantom of the Opera" with Clive Owen. I made a big pot of hot chili for dinner. Thing was that I wasn't feeling good so I had PB&J instead. Later in the night we had hot chocolate w/ marshmellows. Sometimes cold nights are really nice. Only bad thing was that I am allergic to a new aftershave he used, so after around 2 hours I started itching really bad and had to take Benedryl.
It's only my luck, right?
I'm still iffy on the whole dating while you have cancer thing...


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